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What happens when men prefer porn?

Not to me. Intimacy was never frightening to me. And I was very intimate with both wives. The first betrayed me most brutally. The second simply died from Alzheimer’s. I’m now 73 and don’t plan on having any more relationships. Though who knows.
 
Men see relationships differently than 20-30 years ago. Commitment phobia, dating anxiety, desire for freedom, bad past experiences, putting career first, dating apps that are overwhelming are a few reasons why some choose not to jump in the water.

I worked with a guy that used Backpage and Craigslist personals regularly when they existed. He lived alone, did whatever he wanted in his off time, kept his apartment the way he liked, and 2-3 times a month he'd pay a girl to come over to satisfy his carnal needs.
She'd leave and he was back on his own again, just the way he liked it. He seemed to be very happy not having any personal commitments to anyone, not having to answer to anyone, or explain himself.
Not sure if porn figured into his life, which is the topic of this thread, but he certainly valued his personal freedom over everything else.
 
Me and my wife are on the same page

But my snarky response to an imaginary partner that wants to come after me for watching porn. Let's talk about your vibrators. They're great I'll even give them as gifts. Just think it's a little hypocritical to come after what gives me solo pleasure. While you got a $200 torque master 3000 in the drawer and a few others.
 
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This thread reminds me of an ex. We were on vacation in Vegas for my cousin's wedding.

She had this weird bet of let's not have sex the whole weekend. She didn't give a reason, just the bet. I easily agreed. I laughed out loud and also in my head thinking... Okay, let's see who blinks first. Because if I'm not getting any... that means you're not getting any too.

I love sex but I don't need it like a drug. I can go long periods without sex and not be worried or thirsty for it.
 
greenmonster said:
Men see relationships differently than 20-30 years ago. Commitment phobia, dating anxiety, desire for freedom, bad past experiences, putting career first, dating apps that are overwhelming are a few reasons why some choose not to jump in the water.

I worked with a guy that used Backpage and Craigslist personals regularly when they existed. He lived alone, did whatever he wanted in his off time, kept his apartment the way he liked, and 2-3 times a month he'd pay a girl to come over to satisfy his carnal needs.
She'd leave and he was back on his own again, just the way he liked it. He seemed to be very happy not having any personal commitments to anyone, not having to answer to anyone, or explain himself.
Not sure if porn figured into his life, which is the topic of this thread, but he certainly valued his personal freedom over everything else.
Click to expand...

Of course porn figured into his life. If anyone wants to give money to a prostitute, that's their business, between them and the prostitute. As long as they're not cheating or becoming addicted, who cares?

You turned your intention of the thread from pornography to prostitution which are two very different topics. I find it weird that you conflate the two. Is there a connection between them, yes. I'm not stupid, I know that. But I would bet 100 hobo dollars that 90% of guys that have an addiction to porn have never spent time with a prostitute. Jerking off to [insert category] is so far removed from meeting up with someone you paid money to for sex.

Your opinion comes off as very puritan... Like you also wouldn't agree with girls wearing skirts above their knees.

People like fucking. It's not only human nature but Earthly nature of all animals. Shaming people for it is an archaic belief process.

Find something else to be concerned about. People's sex lives ain't it.
 
Melissa said:
maybe because emotional intimacy is frightening.
Click to expand...
BINGO! Hugs to you for breaking it down in 6 words.

Men need to own their shit. "without having to put up with the rest of what comes with a relationship" what a crock. Stop pointing outwards and start looking inwards.

Redirection towards women by mentioning OnlyFans, $, and "waitressing" is nothing but misogynist BS.
 
greenmonster said:
Men see relationships differently than 20-30 years ago. Commitment phobia, dating anxiety, desire for freedom, bad past experiences, putting career first, dating apps that are overwhelming are a few reasons why some choose not to jump in the water.

I worked with a guy that used Backpage and Craigslist personals regularly when they existed. He lived alone, did whatever he wanted in his off time, kept his apartment the way he liked, and 2-3 times a month he'd pay a girl to come over to satisfy his carnal needs.
She'd leave and he was back on his own again, just the way he liked it. He seemed to be very happy not having any personal commitments to anyone, not having to answer to anyone, or explain himself.
Not sure if porn figured into his life, which is the topic of this thread, but he certainly valued his personal freedom over everything else.
Click to expand...
All of that is covered by 6 words.
Melissa said:
maybe because emotional intimacy is frightening.
Click to expand...
 
I wish I had a good woman in my life, but given my age and my stroke, I can’t offer much. And I don’t think that the chances of finding another woman like my second wife are very good. I’m happy in my old age.
 
ST Guy said:
I wish I had a good woman in my life, but given my age and my stroke, I can’t offer much. And I don’t think that the chances of finding another woman like my second wife are very good. I’m happy in my old age.
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I think about all the things my wife carried away with her when she died. The largest was my ability to be fair to any woman who turns to me looking for a complete relationship.

I, also, am seventy three. I just did fifteen years, from leukemia diagnosis to picking up her ashes, and don't have any thing left in the tank for another adventure.

Usta' live in a small town in S.E. Germany as a kid. On nice days the market square was always filled with old coots on cafe chairs watching the young babes. The codgers never said anything or bothered anyone, but they looked like they were watching a fashion show in the sunshine. I get it now.

I'll raise my kaffee at you as you look for an empty seat.
 
One man's porn is another man's high art.

Remember when Ed Meese, attorney general for Reagan, had all the naked statuary in the rotunda covered before a presser? How about Vermeer's "The Milkmaid" and accusations of covert eroticism from 1665 critics.

My wife once caught me staring at my laptop very intently, wanted to know what I was looking at. I said "porn". She slapped the back of my head when she looked over my shoulder at the 'puter screen and found potential wall paper of a 1973 R-90-S. TBH, there has never been a ding in our thing regarding eroticism.

One woman's perception of a man's viewing of art is the thing here, I think.

(Make your own simile about two large jugs in this space.)
 
Eldritch said:
Oh boy. That article is kind of a lot. It seems to me to be an overreaction stirred up to bait clicks in a world of click 'baitin.
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El dirty, I like to disagree with you sometimes because I know it's all in good faith but this post.

Pretty much.

c4f97dad-8afd-4e12-8ecc-b63c0025312e_text.gif
 
Kurosaki said:
Of course porn figured into his life. If anyone wants to give money to a prostitute, that's their business, between them and the prostitute. As long as they're not cheating or becoming addicted, who cares?

You turned your intention of the thread from pornography to prostitution which are two very different topics. I find it weird that you conflate the two. Is there a connection between them, yes. I'm not stupid, I know that. But I would bet 100 hobo dollars that 90% of guys that have an addiction to porn have never spent time with a prostitute. Jerking off to [insert category] is so far removed from meeting up with someone you paid money to for sex.

Your opinion comes off as very puritan... Like you also wouldn't agree with girls wearing skirts above their knees.

People like fucking. It's not only human nature but Earthly nature of all animals. Shaming people for it is an archaic belief process.

Find something else to be concerned about. People's sex lives
Click to expand...
I was making a point about how some guys don’t want to commit to a partner and are happier for it. Society tells us to fund a mate but here’s a guy who rejected that notion.

And yeah, porn probably figured in to his life.
I actually envied the guy in some respects.
He never had to hear “honey I think the sofa would go better over there” or “ I don’t want a burger, can we get sushi?”.
Bring in a committed relationship means having to compromise on pretty much everything which sometimes comes at the expense of your own happiness.
 
If there was no benefit to LTRs, our species would have evolved away from them a long time ago, but we haven't.

Yes, the under-40 crowd doesn't enter LTRs as much as previous generations, but I blame that on technology rather than some sudden realization that LTRs are a bad idea. Technology has led to the rise of the red-pill, black-pill, and wannabe alpha-bro communities that try to make men feel macho for staying single. In reality they're just justifying being emotionally lazy and misogynistic.

Technology has also allowed women to juggle several suitors, hookups, simps, cucks, sugar daddies, and everything in between, reducing the desire for an LTR.
 
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I think it's probably exceedingly rare for a man to prefer porn, but fairly common to accept it as a less-effort substitute when you have other priorities / issues / whatever.

The effort required is disproportionate and getting worse.

There are societal implications and practices that have not kept up with other modern trends and shifts. I have some slightly cynical / sarcastic / stir-the-pot takes on the whole situation, but....see my sig for the relevant bit about lens of your own experiences and media sources.
 
When I read that Men are leaving the dating scene, it reads like it's the man's fault.

When I read that Women are leaving the dating scene, it reads like it's the man's fault.
 
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