Airplane passenger dress code

[Johndicezx9]

I had a rough flight on TAROM into Bucharest on an ancient 737 and I swear I saw the pilot kiss the tarmac when he got out...

 

[Enchanter]

Children, maybe. I have seen older folks in exit rows before many times. Especially on Southwest. I'm under the impression that flight crews cannot force them to reseat so long as they agree to assist should an emergency occur because to do otherwise would mean that you're assuming they're not 100% able to help and I'm sure that'd offend somebody somewhere if not the actual person...

Exit seating (a)

(1) Each certificate holder shall determine, to the extent necessary to perform the applicable functions of paragraph (d) of this section, the suitability of each person it permits to occupy an exit seat, in accordance with this section. For the purpose of this section -

(i) Exit seat means -

(A) Each seat having direct access to an exit; and,

(B) Each seat in a row of seats through which passengers would have to pass to gain access to an exit, from the first seat inboard of the exit to the first aisle inboard of the exit.

(ii) A passenger seat having “direct access” means a seat from which a passenger can proceed directly to the exit without entering an aisle or passing around an obstruction.

(2) Each certificate holder shall make the passenger exit seating determinations required by this paragraph in a non-discriminatory manner consistent with the requirements of this section, by persons designated in the certificate holder's required operations manual.

(3) Each certificate holder shall designate the exit seats for each passenger seating configuration in its fleet in accordance with the definitions in this paragraph and submit those designations for approval as part of the procedures required to be submitted for approval under paragraphs and (p) of this section.

(b) No certificate holder may seat a person in a seat affected by this section if the certificate holder determines that it is likely that the person would be unable to perform one or more of the applicable functions listed in paragraph (d) of this section because -

(1) The person lacks sufficient mobility, strength, or dexterity in both arms and hands, and both legs:

(i) To reach upward, sideways, and downward to the location of emergency exit and exit-slide operating mechanisms;

(ii) To grasp and push, pull, turn, or otherwise manipulate those mechanisms;

(iii) To push, shove, pull, or otherwise open emergency exits;

(iv) To lift out, hold, deposit on nearby seats, or maneuver over the seatbacks to the next row objects the size and weight of over-wing window exit doors;

(v) To remove obstructions similar in size and weight to over-wing exit doors;

(vi) To reach the emergency exit expeditiously;

(vii) To maintain balance while removing obstructions;

(viii) To exit expeditiously;

(ix) To stabilize an escape slide after deployment; or

(x) To assist others in getting off an escape slide;

(2) The person is less than 15 years of age or lacks the capacity to perform one or more of the applicable functions listed in paragraph (d) of this section without the assistance of an adult companion, parent, or other relative;

(3) The person lacks the ability to read and understand instructions required by this section and related to emergency evacuation provided by the certificate holder in printed or graphic form or the ability to understand oral crew commands.

(4) The person lacks sufficient visual capacity to perform one or more of the applicable functions in paragraph (d) of this section without the assistance of visual aids beyond contact lenses or eyeglasses;

(5) The person lacks sufficient aural capacity to hear and understand instructions shouted by flight attendants, without assistance beyond a hearing aid;

(6) The person lacks the ability adequately to impart information orally to other passengers; or,

(7) The person has:

(i) A condition or responsibilities, such as caring for small children, that might prevent the person from performing one or more of the applicable functions listed in paragraph (d) of this section; or

(ii) A condition that might cause the person harm if he or she performs one or more of the applicable functions listed in paragraph (d) of this section.

(c) Each passenger shall comply with instructions given by a crewmember or other authorized employee of the certificate holder implementing exit seating restrictions established in accordance with this section.

(d) Each certificate holder shall include on passenger information cards, presented in the language in which briefings and oral commands are given by the crew, at each exit seat affected by this section, information that, in the event of an emergency in which a crewmember is not available to assist, a passenger occupying an exit seat may use if called upon to perform the following functions:

(1) Locate the emergency exit;

(2) Recognize the emergency exit opening mechanism;

(3) Comprehend the instructions for operating the emergency exit;

(4) Operate the emergency exit;

(5) Assess whether opening the emergency exit will increase the hazards to which passengers may be exposed;

(6) Follow oral directions and hand signals given by a crewmember;

(7) Stow or secure the emergency exit door so that it will not impede use of the exit;

(8) Assess the condition of an escape slide, activate the slide, and stabilize the slide after deployment to assist others in getting off the slide;

(9) Pass expeditiously through the emergency exit; and

(10) Assess, select, and follow a safe path away from the emergency exit.

(e) Each certificate holder shall include on passenger information cards, at each exit seat -

(1) In the primary language in which emergency commands are given by the crew, the selection criteria set forth in paragraph (b) of this section, and a request that a passenger identify himself or herself to allow reseating if he or she:

(i) Cannot meet the selection criteria set forth in paragraph (b) of this section;

(ii) Has a nondiscernible condition that will prevent him or her from performing the applicable functions listed in paragraph (d) of this section;

(iii) May suffer bodily harm as the result of performing one or more of those functions; or

(iv) Does not wish to perform those functions; and

(2) In each language used by the certificate holder for passenger information cards, a request that a passenger identify himself or herself to allow reseating if he or she lacks the ability to read, speak, or understand the language or the graphic form in which instructions required by this section and related to emergency evacuation are provided by the certificate holder, or the ability to understand the specified language in which crew commands will be given in an emergency.

(3) May suffer bodily harm as the result of performing one or more of those functions; or,

(4) Does not wish to perform those functions.
A certificate holder shall not require the passenger to disclose his or her reason for needing reseating.

(f) Each certificate holder shall make available for inspection by the public at all passenger loading gates and ticket counters at each airport where it conducts passenger operations, written procedures established for making determinations in regard to exit row seating.

(g) No certificate holder may allow taxi or pushback unless at least one required crewmember has verified that no exit seat is occupied by a person the crewmember determines is likely to be unable to perform the applicable functions listed in paragraph (d) of this section.

(h) Each certificate holder shall include in its passenger briefings a reference to the passenger information cards, required by paragraphs (d) and (e), the selection criteria set forth in paragraph (b), and the functions to be performed, set forth in paragraph (d) of this section.

(i) Each certificate holder shall include in its passenger briefings a request that a passenger identify himself or herself to allow reseating if he or she -

(1) Cannot meet the selection criteria set forth in paragraph (b) of this section;

(2) Has a nondiscernible condition that will prevent him or her from performing the applicable functions listed in paragraph (d) of this section;

(3) May suffer bodily harm as the result of performing one or more of those functions listed in paragraph (d) of this section; or,

(4) Does not wish to perform those functions listed in paragraph (d) of this section.
A certificate holder shall not require the passenger to disclose his or her reason for needing reseating.

(j) [Reserved]

(k) In the event a certificate holder determines in accordance with this section that it is likely that a passenger assigned to an exit seat would be unable to perform the functions listed in paragraph (d) of this section or a passenger requests a non-exit seat, the certificate holder shall expeditiously relocate the passenger to a non-exit seat.

(l) In the event of full booking in the non-exit seats and if necessary to accommodate a passenger being relocated from an exit seat, the certificate holder shall move a passenger who is willing and able to assume the evacuation functions that may be required, to an exit seat.

(m) A certificate holder may deny transportation to any passenger under this section only because -

(1) The passenger refuses to comply with instructions given by a crewmember or other authorized employee of the certificate holder implementing exit seating restrictions established in accordance with this section, or

(2) The only seat that will physically accommodate the person's handicap is an exit seat.

In order to comply with this section certificate holders shall -

(1) Establish procedures that address:

(i) The criteria listed in paragraph (b) of this section;

(ii) The functions listed in paragraph (d) of this section;

(iii) The requirements for airport information, passenger information cards, crewmember verification of appropriate seating in exit seats, passenger briefings, seat assignments, and denial of transportation as set forth in this section;

(iv) How to resolve disputes arising from implementation of this section, including identification of the certificate holder employee on the airport to whom complaints should be addressed for resolution; and,

(2) Submit their procedures for preliminary review and approval to the principal operations inspectors assigned to them at the responsible Flight Standards office.

(o) Certificate holders shall assign seats prior to boarding consistent with the criteria listed in paragraph (b) and the functions listed in paragraph (d) of this section, to the maximum extent feasible.

(p) The procedures required by paragraph of this section will not become effective until final approval is granted by the Executive Director, Flight Standards Service, Washington, DC. Approval will be based solely upon the safety aspects of the certificate holder's procedures.

Also, what happens when you need to catch a flight and the emergency exit rows aren't available? Do you just not fly?

I have a plan when I'm not in an exit row, I didn't say I won't sit elsewhere.

 

[Kornholio]

Notwithstanding the legalese...it's still done and on a daily basis I'm sure since I don't fly as much as many people do and I see it almost every time I fly Southwest. Literally all they do is ask if you're willing and able to help and if you say yes, you can sit there. Also, the code says "one or more functions". If they can open the door (literally anyone can easily), that's one function. Technically if you want to split hairs, that means they can sit there.

FWIW, I'm not talking about geriatric people with disabilities. I'm talking about people that are clearly over 65 and likely couldn't even get themselves out of the plane with a sense of urgency in the first place.

 

[Eldritch]

Yet another reason to avoid SFO. I rarely fly out of that airport as it's almost always a clusterfuck. However, the couple of times I've been forced to, it's never been a different security experience than Oakland or San Jose.

Well, flying from OAK would require I physically be in the East Bay, which every decent person tries to avoid at all costs, because, ewwwww.

I'm sure SJC is lovely, but I don't want to have to travel to Southern Arizona, or Sonora, or whatever State it is San Jose is in just so I can fly.

 

[wazzuFreddo]

You know what really pisses me off about flying?

That I am 12 deep on the upgrade list for my next flight.

 

[Eldritch]

You know what really pisses me off about flying?

That I am 12 deep on the upgrade list for my next flight.

Is there any fucking way to just make an airline where you pay more for the whole flight to be an upgrade? Fucking hell.

I feel like Virgin used to be this, but since Alaska bought them, Alaska is now getting tighter.

 

[TripleSeven]

And now that I’ve landed back in San Jose, I have another rant. In what I can only describe as absolute one hundred percent karma for whining about fellow travelers...the fucking idiot who was in the seat next to me spilled Diet Coke all over my leg.

So you know what Mr. Grown Ass Man who’s mother ordered him a soft drink? Maybe time to use sippy cups or use bottles with closable caps if you can’t consume food and beverages without getting it anywhere but your fucking face hole.

LMAO. I will only fly first class.

 

[CABilly]

OMG dude - even the finest wool is a pale comparison to cashmere. it’s the most magical body temperature regulating fabric. the same garment is warm when it’s cold, and cool when it’s hot. it defies explanation how perfect it is - and goes without saying, sublimely soft and comfortable - almost ethereal when touching your skin. makes even the most uncomfortable situation tolerable. perfect for travel.

Considering I spent more on my hunting clothes than my wife's wedding dress, I think I'd rather upgrade to business or 1st class than try to to go head-toe multi-layer cashmere. Would be nice, though

 

[lizard]

Random thoughts:

• 1990 RT SFO to Hong Kong - I paid $800, in 2019 RT SFO to Phuket - I paid $770. How the F can this be possible?
• Just before take-off, I scan for vacant seats/rows and relocate as soon as I can
• Most crashes occur during take-off or landing so before take-off and landing, I tighten seatbelts and raise feet off floor (avoid dismemberment)
• During flight, hang out in back w/stewardesses and chitchat
• Don’t make eye contact with any baby!
• I always stay belted; I dont need to head-butt the ceiling.
• I learned some survival tips from this thread
• A few years ago I started using ear plugs to drown out jet engine noise; it helps! And also a mask for deep sleep.
• Friend suggested saline spray to keep nasal passages moist which reduces headache I used to get when traveling to AsiaEurope; it helps!

 

[wazzuFreddo]

Random thoughts:

• 1990 RT SFO to Hong Kong - I paid $800, in 2019 RT SFO to Phuket - I paid $770. How the F can this be possible?
• Just before take-off, I scan for vacant seats/rows and relocate as soon as I can
• Most crashes occur during take-off or landing so before take-off and landing, I tighten seatbelts and raise feet off floor (avoid dismemberment)
• During flight, hang out in back w/stewardesses and chitchat
• Don’t make eye contact with any baby!
• I always stay belted; I dont need to head-butt the ceiling.
• I learned some survival tips from this thread
• A few years ago I started using ear plugs to drown out jet engine noise; it helps! And also a mask for deep sleep.
• Friend suggested saline spray to keep nasal passages moist which reduces headache I used to get when traveling to AsiaEurope; it helps!

 

[littlebeast]

Considering I spent more on my hunting clothes than my wife's wedding dress, I think I'd rather upgrade to business or 1st class than try to to go head-toe multi-layer cashmere. Would be nice, though

for a single international flight, rt business or first is usually at least $3,000 more - sometimes a lot more than that. you can buy a quite a lot of cashmere for that price - and it lasts forever (so less than one trip’s worth would likely last you 20 years worth of travel). since you know quality kit, you also know that spending more up front pays off in the long run. yeah - high quality cashmere isn’t cheap, but it’s every bit as durable as merino wool - and is wayyyy softer and more comfortable.

wrt to domestic flights - unless they have lay flat seats in business or first, the best seats on the plane are exit row seats in coach. the premium cabin food on domestic flights sucks ass, so you might as well opt for the boxed or bagged meal (or snag your own at the airport pre-flight), the legroom is greater than up front, and no one can recline their seat into your face. the only issue is the line for the toilet, but if you pay attention and plan it right - that’s workable too.

 

[Eldritch]

2019 RT SFO to Phuket

YEAH YOU DID!!

 

[Cycle61]

wrt to domestic flights - unless they have lay flat seats in business or first, the best seats on the plane are exit row seats in coach. the premium cabin food on domestic flights sucks ass, so you might as well opt for the boxed or bagged meal (or snag your own at the airport pre-flight), the legroom is greater than up front, and no one can recline their seat into your face. the only issue is the line for the toilet, but if you pay attention and plan it right - that’s workable too.

I'd rather have the extra lateral and mental space of a 1st class seat than the legroom of coach exit row.

And I don't have to worry about Enchanter climbing over me.

 

[Blankpage]

I intentionally eat or drink very little on fly day to avoid trips to the toilet and the pita that comes with that.
Chowing down on big meals at the airport before a flight is just too much of a risk.

 

[wazzuFreddo]

An oldie but goodie. (This post is coming from inside the plane, but I do have a cup of coffee )

[YOUTUBE]BNxbc1o2KLU[/YOUTUBE]

 

[aminalmutha]

While dressing like a slob is annoying, it also makes one easier to pick out as a vapid dipshit in case of emergency. Either avoid or shove, whichever is necessary at the time.

What should be BANNED whilst traveling is perfume and being a dirty fucker. Just be normal. Sit down and shut the fuck up.

Deplane row by row; people who run to the front should be shoved off the side, straight to the pavement.

And if I have my headphones in, unless you are alerting me of an emergency, the flight attendant trying to hand me something or something else actually important... SHUT YOUR FUCKING COCKHOLSTER, YOU FUCKING DRUNK ASSHOLE.

 

[madsen203]

I like to travel with flip flops, sweat suit, and a backpack/pillow. Easy to get through TSA, comfortable, and quick.

 

[m_asim]

My solution is to eat a lot of chili two hours before flight. Then if its a kid using my seat for kicking practice or someone not observant of my personal space, it's shock and awe time! Silent fart-bombs, strong enough to kill sewer rats, go off! There may be some innocent noncombatants caught downwind but I sat a silent prayer for them and chalk it up to collateral damage.

The asshole that’s in shorts, tank top, and fucking flip flops is now mine and everyone else’s problem because we have to worry about them

That guy is food if the plane lands and search parties cannot find you.

 

[gixxerjeff]

SHUT YOUR FUCKING COCKHOLSTER, YOU FUCKING DRUNK ASSHOLE.

You had me at *cockholster*.

 

[Kornholio]

Well, flying from OAK would require I physically be in the East Bay, which every decent person tries to avoid at all costs, because, ewwwww.

I'm sure SJC is lovely, but I don't want to have to travel to Southern Arizona, or Sonora, or whatever State it is San Jose is in just so I can fly.

You know there is a world outside of your little "island", right?

I like to travel with flip flops, sweat suit, and a backpack/pillow. Easy to get through TSA, comfortable, and quick.

[youtube]6DvcD-UByl8[/youtube]