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Ask Eldritch (I don't recommend it)

Eldritch

Eldritch

is insensitive
Joined
Aug 13, 2004
Location
Nifelheim
Moto(s)
Honda 919: Apocalypse Edition
Name
Asmodeus
fasteddie_rr said:

I thinkest you shouls start an "Ask Eldritch" thread in order to spread your wisdom and knowledge to the universe.
Click to expand...

Happy now? :laughing
 
where have i seen a thread like this before? :confused
 
is it ok to dry fire any caliber gun, or shotgun other than a .22? Is it because .22 is rim fire?
 
uhmeebuh said:
Dear Eldritch -

Why does this thread make me feel like tiny velociraptors are eating my heart? Is it better to ask you or MizCoop?

Sincerely -

Uhmeehulk
Click to expand...

Question 1) That gnawing at your heart has to do with a couple of things, one being a very basic survival instinct that most mammals, even a Mutant Specimen of the Scottish Mountain Gorilla variety such as yourself possesses. On a primal level you know that asking questions of Eldritch is a terrible idea, it can only harm you and those you love and that Eldritch will take no accountability for any incidents, accidents, or pregnancies that result as a by product of your asking questions. You are also having a twinge of anticipation pending my total pwning of you in Alameda tomorrow. :teeth

Question 2) You actually already know the answer to this, but I will state it for all to hear since I think you desire I reiterate the sentiment. It is better to ask MizCoop, regardless of circumstance, logic, legal precedent or divine intention, MizCoop is ALWAYS right. No matter what. If I said the same thing that MizCoop was going to say, she would be more right than I was by nature of her being.


Poor Sonny. :teeth

xgambit said:
where have i seen a thread like this before? :confused
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Some other, less relevant post whore. :teeth


Beetlejuice said:
is it ok to dry fire any caliber gun, or shotgun other than a .22? Is it because .22 is rim fire?
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No, never. When dry firing your weapon you should use the snap caps that they sell at all the guns stores, but when you purchase them, you should be very picky and ask how they will effect your range time. Ask the clerk at the counter if he can get them for you in Carbon Fiber and if they have Spinners. Buy them for your 9mm but tell them you are going to buy a Desert Eagle once you get the 9 sold. Tell them you need to bling your shit out so you can get paid.
 
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Dear Eldritch,

Is there a reason that you didn't add that you would actually answer any questions asked of you?

And, will I ever return your sunglasses?

Sincerely,
Arnoha
 
Eldritch,

Do letter carriers sport those spiffy knee socks for protection from the elements, or for protecting their shins from human bites while they're trying to get their knees onto someone's throat?
 
arnoha said:
Dear Eldritch,

Is there a reason that you didn't add that you would actually answer any questions asked of you?

And, will I ever return your sunglasses?

Sincerely,
Arnoha
Click to expand...

Ask me no questions and I'll tell you no lies. I didn't state I would answer them all because I won't. I'll only answer what I feel like when I feel like. I told you guys I didn't recommend this thread and I place all liability on FAst EddieRR for making me do it.

You should come to the Alameda meet tomorrow night with the Jolly Red Giant and bring back my sunglasses so I can lick your hella greasy new eyeball.


VTRweasel said:
Dear Eldritch -

Are you down with P ?
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Yes, as a matter of fact I'm down with all the English letters with the exception of X, whose militant statement that he is actually a number pisses me off.

throwback said:
Eldritch,

Do letter carriers sport those spiffy knee socks for protection from the elements, or for protecting their shins from human bites while they're trying to get their knees onto someone's throat?
Click to expand...

It's actually neither. The knee socks were part of a USPS campaign to design a uniform that much like the Nazi SS Uniform design, demanded respect, struck fear into the hearts of their enemies, and created a timeless chic that would be mirrored by cultists and counter culturists for decades to come. Unfortunately rather than a fashion designer or marketing professional, due to his military background a potato masher, the uniform was deigned by a mildly retarded hermaphrodite from Alabama named Tina. Koolots and the knee socks in question are the unfortunate result.
 
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dear eldirty?

is this your brokeback buddy?

1587092-marin3l33tistssmall.jpg


love
chess
 
xgambit said:
dear eldirty?

is this your brokeback buddy?


love
chess
Click to expand...

No, since he was no longer employed, I kicked his ass to the curb. Bitch betta have my money, not some, not half, but all.
 
Dear Eldritch,


Is it a good thing that you and I have never met personally?


Have you found pvd yet?


Did you videotape it?
 
Eldritch said:


Unfortunately rather than a fashion designer or marketing professional, due to his military background a potato masher, the uniform was deigned by a mildly retarded hermaphrodite from Alabama named Tina.
Click to expand...

you claim be down with all letters equally, save for X and it's egomaniacal duality, so why spite poor s? the lowercase s, an already subservient consonant living in the shadow of and egotisitcal uppercase sibling that has been omitted from the above sentence. twice! why why why?
 
xgambit said:
dear eldirty?

is this your brokeback buddy?

1587092-marin3l33tistssmall.jpg


love
chess
Click to expand...

All these years and its still a disturbing photo. Time heals all wounds?? Nope.

BTW...I'm employed again:love
 
E-

How many people are on the list of-

"Wanting to be the friction in Alaynas jeans".?
 
To Whom It May Concern,

Why do they make football baseball caps?

Earnestly,
-zefflyn
 
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