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A Tinder Story...

Been Happily Married for close to 8 years.
Tinder is not something I have any clue about.

The only advice I have for you is because I have the "sales person background".
Sounds like you forgot to ask a very important question up front.
"What the person is looking for. What their expectations are from meeting and dating somebody on Tinder." I think you had this realization in your post. A lot of sales people forget to ask the customer what their expectations are and to set the stage so that you can reference back to it later.

It's like you got all the way down to trying to collect the purchase order and found out that they never wanted to buy "X" they were just trialing it for "Y" and what you both ended up with is "Z".

Does that make sense?
 
Sounds about right. I assumed the sale was final from the beginning. :laughing

Roundboy said:
Been Happily Married for close to 8 years.
Tinder is not something I have any clue about.

The only advice I have for you is because I have the "sales person background".
Sounds like you forgot to ask a very important question up front.
"What the person is looking for. What their expectations are from meeting and dating somebody on Tinder." I think you had this realization in your post. A lot of sales people forget to ask the customer what their expectations are and to set the stage so that you can reference back to it later.

It's like you got all the way down to trying to collect the purchase order and found out that they never wanted to buy "X" they were just trialing it for "Y" and what you both ended up with is "Z".

Does that make sense?
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MrIncredible said:
There are no women in that photo.
Enjoy your dating life. :p
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:rofl Bastid! :rofl
I just noticed the bathroom was for the Men. :rofl OMG my sides hurt!

Hooli said:
Agreed. And I stand by my words. :laughing
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Dang that was a good first 2 page read! :laughing

whitelotus said:
Pro tip: Don't ever go to Thailand.
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Fat Chance now! :laughing

rjbrittain11 said:
Last night I went out with 'JW.' I drove to her house and picked her up. She wasn't wearing the right attire I would have chosen for bowling. She gets in my truck and I say to her "Glad you wore your perfect bowling outfit. I should have worn my black mini skirt too!" She responds with, "I figured we aren't spending the whole night bowling." "I didn't either," I respond.

Bowling was great. I won two games, she legitimately won the 3rd game. She was a decent bowler against myself who barely bowls 100. I am very inconsistent and it kept if fun since I didn't destroy her every game.

We left bowling for a local bar with a band playing. We walked into what looked like a bonfire party in Arkansas. It was that kind of crowd. We had a great time people watching. After a couple drinks, we went to another local bar to finish the evening. A little diner after drinks that was next door and I drove her home.

I will leave most of the details out about this one as you all complained about the length of the last post, but she is heading over to my place in a few minutes to 'watch movies.'

I will say, this isn't a Tinder date...so it could go a whole different direction...


EDIT: I'll make sure to have the Wedding Planning book casually on the coffee table. :thumbup
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Sounds great! Good Luck!

I met my current GF on POF. We've been together 3 weeks. Taking it real slow on the emotional level. She is real sweet, we have a nice time together. My dog likes her, so that is a good sign.

Mr Homer kind of turned against my X wife about the same time I suspected something was getting hinky.
 
bruceflinch said:
:rofl Bastid! :rofl
I just noticed the bathroom was for the Men. :rofl OMG my sides hurt!

I met my current GF on POF. We've been together 3 weeks. Taking it real slow on the emotional level. She is real sweet, we have a nice time together. My dog likes her, so that is a good sign.

Mr Homer kind of turned against my X wife about the same time I suspected something was getting hinky.
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This new girl....is her name Lola?

[youtube]nVXmMMSo47s[/youtube]
 
Whirlwind of a weekend!

Friday night I went out with "JW." Went pretty well....but on to Saturday.

She texts me up and wants to see me again. I had no plans so I'm up for it. The plan was for her to come over and watch some movies. Its the ol' "lets watch movies but not really watch movies" kinda of thing, at least thats what was thinking.

Since we didn't have any sexual physical activity Friday night, I had to do something to jump start that interaction fast, or we all know what happens...friend zoned.

She gets to my house around 8, and we head off to Target to get some snacks. I had planned for her to come with me to get them rather than have them ready since it would be kind of an adventure to see what shes in to. We get to Target and just pick out he normal, popcorn, some M&M's, something to drink, and some Chex-Mex.

Get back to my place and she up to watch anything....so I throw on some Pr0n and the rest is history...

Not exactly.

We start the night off with a movie called Gone Girl. Not bad, but Ben Affleck is a shitty actor. That movie gets done and still I haven't made a move on her. Not even snuggling together on the couch. So this is going to change right now I tell myself. In the process of getting the next movie ready, Paranormal Activity 2, we are walking from the kitchen to the living room and I grab her waist, "Come here, I've wanted to do this since last night but haven't had the right opportunity," I said as I bring her into my arms. I reach up with my right hand and rest it on her cheek as I lean in and kiss her. She instantly gets shy and pulls away after a few seconds and says in a laughing tone "sorry, I'm really shy." I let go of her cheek as I say "its okay, we can overcome that together." I lean in and kiss her again. She warms up a little more, but I pull away before she gets the chance to. We let go of each other and I say "we have a scary movie to watch." I do this with the idea that I am in control of the interaction, and not her.

We sit back down on the couch and start the next movie. Mind you its 12:30am at this point, but I can tell that even if I tried to make more of an advance I will get shut down. This will take the ball out of my court I don't advance any moves. I do pull her close to me this time and we relax resting on each other for the rest of the movie.

After the movie was done, she leaves. As I walk her to her car she says "I had a nice night. I don't have any plans tomorrow if you want to see each other again." Ok, now I know she likes me. "Ya," I say, "I have to paint a motorcycle tomorrow but after we can do something." She likes that idea.

The next day I start the paint process on some BMW S1000RR parts. As the day goes on, I realize that I committed to a friends photography showing Sunday night. The event is at Lanesplitters in Berkeley where my friend is having his photography showcased for the month of February. I haven't seen my friend for a long time and I don't want to miss it.

Text Conversation:

Me: My friend is having an art gallery opening today from 4-7pm. Want to be my date? :)
Her: (After a long delay) Sorry I didn't see your text and ya that sounds class lol I've never been to one, Where is it at?
Me: Its in Berkeley
Her: Berkeley is cool I haven't been there in a while. Do u think there's gonna be traffic?
Me: Nope there won't be. So you wanna go??
Her: Yeah! :)
Me: great! will u be ready at 4 if i pick u up then?
Her: How about 5:30? Is that ok?
Me: No! Thats way too late! 5:15 at the latest, be ready :p

I pick her up at 5:30. Yes I said 5:15, but I was running late. We go to the event, it was fun to see my friend that I haven't seen for awhile. We pig out on pizza, well, I pig out on pizza, she has a couple slices. We are both very healthy and in great shape, but this will be my last cheat meal for the next 90 days as I start Show Prep for a Physique Competition May 9th. So i enjoyed alot of pizza!

We leave the event around 8:30 and I take her home and drop her off. A few kisses goodbye, and she goes inside. You may think that I am not being aggressive enough with the physical interaction. That's ok. I am taking this as a "special case" since she is the older sister of one of our fellow motorcyclist's girlfriend. She is stunning. She is fragile. She is very goofy. She is a great person. I am not going to treat her like I have the girls in the past, as my friendship with our fellow motorcyclist and his girlfriend mean more to me that just a piece of ass. So I will take this a little slower than I normally do. I have already got much insight from her sister that shes into me, as I am into her.

But I am not doing to make the same mistake with JW as I did with Nikki. I am not going to assume anything. It's too early in the game to ask what she is looking for, but that time will come the next time we see each other...
 
Anyone reading these posts start to finish? Not sure whats going on here. OP sounds like he's bored and a closet writer.

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Dubbington said:
Anyone reading these posts start to finish? Not sure whats going on here. OP sounds like he's bored and a closet writer.

rn2.jpg
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Mostly Bored. Not a closet writer by any means. I like telling this story tho as its BARF, everyone loves fucking drama.
 
This wasn't nearly as long as the OP. So this one was a walk in the park.

But 3 dates and no close? This isn't the 1800's here anymore. You make it to five with no carnal knowledge, and you risk getting Dubbzoned.
 
Yeah, every case is different. Trust your instincts. Good luck. :thumbup
 
TheRobSJ said:
This wasn't nearly as long as the OP. So this one was a walk in the park.

But 3 dates and no close? This isn't the 1800's here anymore. You make it to five with no carnal knowledge, and you risk getting Dubbzoned.
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I know, the logistics for the close were there on the first night, but I failed in progressing to that point. In the back of my mind i had my friend and his GF yelling "you fuck with her and we will fuck with you" repeating over and over.

Even the second night the logistics were there to close.

Like I said in the last post, its the sister of my very close friend's girlfriend. If it doesn't end with a close, I'm not worried about it. My friendship is more important with him :thumbup

I won't get Dubbzoned in this I don't think. I can tell shes into me, but I don't want to count my chickens before they hatch, Nam Sayin??
 
Look at it this way...

She's a big girl, you're a big boy. As long as you're not a douchebag about it afterwards it really doesn't matter if you sleep with someone on the first date, 3rd date, 5th date. If you're both into it go for it. You're mature adults, fuck what the rest of society thinks should or shouldn't happen on date 1, date 2, date 3. There is no set formula for success. Plenty of people in this thread alone can attest to that - 10 years ago, 15 years ago it was near unheard of for a relationship to work with someone you "met online". It's still widely held that if you sleep with someone on the first or second date it's not going to last, and yet there's several here who smashed the first date and every date since for the last 10 years.

Fuck what everyone else thinks, do what you two feel is doable/fun/whatever. You're not 16 and your buddy and his gf are not her parents telling you to bring her home by the time the street lights turn on.
 
I think there is something to be said about waiting, especially if there are friends involved.

In the end, what does it really hurt to wait a couple weeks? If anything, it builds up the tension and makes it kinda cool.

If it was a chick from the bar you didn't intend on dating and it was mutually agreed upon that both people just wanted action for the night (or maybe ongoing, but nothing serious), then that would be different. But when chasing a relationship, I think it helps, in general.
 
Ducky_Fresh said:
I think there is something to be said about waiting, especially if there are friends involved.

In the end, what does it really hurt to wait a couple weeks? If anything, it builds up the tension and makes it kinda cool.

If it was a chick from the bar you didn't intend on dating and it was mutually agreed upon that both people just wanted action for the night (or maybe ongoing, but nothing serious), then that would be different. But when chasing a relationship, I think it helps, in general.
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Because when the norm is to have sex on the first or second date by the third if you haven't sealed the deal she assumes you're gay, impotent, or not interested and has already mentally shelved you for the next thing.

Clearly as he hasn't made much of an attempt he must find her unattractive-he's only dating her because he knows her through some friends.
 
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